Bushy-Tailed Beady-Eyed Deviltry

I have come to the conclusion that squirrels are little terrorists.  They have systematically implemented a series of cunning machinations to eliminate any avian presence in my backyard that could pose any competition for available seed.  First they hijacked the main birdfeeder by the simple expedient of chewing through the weight-sensitive perch, which would cause the feeder to close when anything heavier than a bird landed on it (thus preventing squirrels from getting the food).  Several months passed, during which the little knaves seemed to be confining their energies to chasing birds (and each other) away from the now-permanently-open holes on the large feeder.  I foolishly believed that my finch feeder was safe from their depradations, however, since the tiny feeder holes were designed specifically for nyjer or thistle seed and could not be of any use to the squirrels.

Meanwhile, the squirrels (all unbeknownst to me) scoffed at my childlike naivete.  All along they were plotting and scheming behind their little clawed paws and menacingly bushy tails, distracting me from their main objective by making periodic diversionary forays into the large feeder.  By the time I discovered their subterfuge, it was too late.  Behold: